What Alan Did

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Hallelujah!!!

I think that after all this time of searching, moaning and bleating I have finally found an equilibrium in my writing. Hard to believe I know. How many times have I come on here whinging and whining about my health complications or the next idea to improve my output? Hmmm?

Plenty, that’s how many.

And before you think to yourselves, “Oh no, here he goes again,” let me tell you that I am finally going to use this blog for it’s intended purpose and nothing more.

Blog! It’s a funny word isn’t it, as it doesn’t readily roll of the tongue as easily as “bollocks,” which, in case you didn’t know is the word in English that can be shouted louder than any other word. I’m not expecting you to nip out into the garden to find out, especially those of you who live in affluent neighbourhoods. Those who live in effluent neighbourhoods might get away with it though.

But enough about bollocks, I want to talk about blogging (it’s so easy to get distracted these days) and how I intend to go about it from here on in.

Blog is basically an amalgamated abbreviation of the words WEB and LOG. You probably knew that anyway so apologies if it sounds like I’m trying to teach Granny to suck eggs. Although why anyone, elderly or otherwise, should want to suck an egg is none of my business. But yes, you take the B from WEB and add it to LOG and you get BLOG.

A log, apart from being a piece of unprocessed timber or euphemism for a turd, is basically a record of events or actions. Such as the Captain’s Log from Star Trek for example. A diary or journal if you will.

I often read the blogs of other independent authors and that seems to be the way they play the thing. They use that platform to keep their readers up to date with what is happening on a daily, weekly or even monthly basis. Julia Blake is especially good at this – CLICK HERE to check her blog out.

I have noticed, and can admit the awkward truth, that I have used mine for the aforementioned whinging and whining and at times even railing against the system and the stupidity of my fellow man. And that is not what I intended at all when this blog began way back in… 2020 I think it was.

So for the future, that is what I foresee for the blog. I’ll keep you posted about little old me. A sort of What Alan Did kind of thing.

Substack, on the other hand, has already had the kick in the arse it desperately needed.

My Substack site was suffering from a touch of bloated pomposity and politicization at times and, again, that was never my intention at the start. I wanted to write humorous short stories and make people laugh and have a brighter day. I’m pleased to say that so far, in 2026, that has been the case. I have written 3 absolute corkers which can be enjoyed HERE.

All good so far then.

“Ah!” I hear you collectively cry. “What about all your health issues that you constantly moan about? Well, I’m glad you asked. I’ve finally started my fibromyalgia blog, entitled – The Adventures of Fibroman, which can be found RIGHT HERE. It’s only in its fledgling state at the moment so be kind and patient with it please. It needs work and time management has never been my strong point so bear with me. All I ask is that if fibromyalgia has affected you or anyone you know then do please get in touch through that channel.

That just leaves us with the novels.

Number 8 is written as a first draft and there will be a couple of months of editing the blessed thing. I’m making no more promises about times and dates; I’ve been hoist by my own petard too often in doing so. I’m just going to get on with getting it finished and let you know when it will be published and do the old cover reveal and all that kind of stuff. I can’t wait to show you the cover.

Phew! Glad I’ve gotten all that lot off my chest. I feel a lot lighter for doing so.

One big change I do want to implement however, is to increase the regularity of the blog. Last year I think I wrote something like 20 blog posts compared to about 100 Substacks and I have neglected the poor, dear old blog as a result. Something I need to work on. Call that my resolution for 2026.

Righto, I’m off to Blessham now to start knocking Joe Wilkie’s latest adventure into shape.

The State of Play

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I’m not really sure where to begin with this…

Apologies first I guess, for taking so long to do a blog post from the last one five weeks ago. I did have something pithy, witty and moderately scathing lined up for Halloween but I suppose that will have to wait until next year. But anyway, sincere apologies for taking so long.

Look, it’s been a bloody tough year here at Blessham Hall. One of the toughest in fact, and the last month or so have been extremely challenging. I’d love to report that the challenge has been getting the new novel featuring Archie and Aggie Stone finished but that would be an out and out lie. The challenge has been one on more personal terms.

On Friday 18th October we received a phone call from my sister-in-law to say that my 92-year-old mother had fallen and broken her hip. Naturally this immediately caused a ton of worry and anxiety for us all and ever since then Ange and I have been travelling the 300-mile round trip to Leicester and back every Friday to Monday to see her and relieve the burden on the rest of the family.

In between I have managed to do a speaking engagement at the local library and a couple of Substack posts but that’s about it. The combination of motorway tailbacks, airbed sleeping, car parking in the middle of Leicester and hospital visits where my mum is talking on a constant loop due to dementia have been very telling on me both physically and mentally.

I’m exhausted.

I even drove home the other week with my TENS machine attached to my aching arms. That’s how bad it is. Trying to change gear around all those wires!

My wife, the lovely Ange, has been an absolute Trojan throughout all of this I have to say. She has supported me better than anyone else could ever have done. I’m so thankful for her.

Love you Ange xxx

But the truth of the matter is that because of all the aforementioned I’m in horrible pain all the time and permanently fatigued. And I mean badly fatigued as well. Not just a little bit tired and in need of a nap; no, I mean I’ve about as much energy in me as…

as…

I don’t even know how to finish that sentence, that’s how low on energy I am.

The other thing is that even despite the lack of energy and physical pain I just can’t seem to find time to write. It’s as if I can’t get any traction going with the laptop. I mentioned the next novel earlier and I have to be honest with you and say that’s it not going to be published this year. In fact, this will be the first year that I have gone without publishing a book since I began my independently-published journey in 2019 with Ah Boy.

And that actually makes me really sad when I think about it.

Of course, I am aware that prior to the current situation I have been labouring long and hard on my Substack output which has in turn made me neglect my first love of novel writing. It’s a lot easier to do a Substack post than it is to churn out an 85,000-word book.

But even Substack is beginning to suffer now and I find myself desperately trying to play catch-up every week. FFS!!! I can’t keep apologising! But that’s what I do.

And I do love writing. I can’t describe to you the immeasurable pleasure that I derive from it. I’m not saying I’m a great writer and I’m not even saying I’m a good one. What I’m saying is that I bloody well love doing it and I just can’t get any done at the moment.

If it sounds like I’m blaming my mum then that’s not the case. I don’t. It’s awful and heart-breaking seeing her the way she is. I’m just trying to convey the effect her accident and the rest of this stinker of a year has had on me; that’s all.

I wanted to put you all in the picture, especially in view of the fact that I’ve had quite an influx of new subscribers lately and I hate to disappoint people. My only excuse, if there is one, is that I do suffer horrendously from fibromyalgia and I do have other health issues as well. I’m just not as resilient as I used to be.

I mean, heck, when I was a younger man you should have seen me go. I was a live-wire of energy, always doing something, even after a hard day’s work. How I long for just a fraction of what I had back then energy wise. These days I’m more like an old worn-out leisure battery. Yes you can charge me up but I’ll run out of charge in no time at all.

Aah bloody hell, I don’t even know where I’m going with this now. It started out as a brief explanation of where I am and it’s turned into some kind of lecture on the physical history of Alan Stevenson.

Sorry folks.

The good news is that my mum has been moved to a lovely rehab hospital now close to where she lives and is getting a lot more visitors and so the pressure on the family is a lot less. So much so that Ange and I have this weekend off from travelling and the airbed. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s a good quality airbed and we’re extremely grateful for the loan of it from our neighbours – Josie and Glyn; its just not the same as one’s own mattress.

So the immediate future looks a bit better shall we say.

That’s all for now as I can feel the fatigue setting in again but I will try and post again next week. I need a bit of a lie down and then I’m going to try and get Substack back up and running and then tomorrow, hopefully, do a bit more towards the next novel.

Here’s hoping at least.

Love you all.

Al x

Inflammation Explanation

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I have gotten a little behind with everything this week and I have a truly valid reason. I’ve been as sick as a pike. And not just with the usual stuff, although that has been horrendous too, but I’ve been smitten with a foul and purulent entity on my body that caused me to miss out my Substack posts on Monday and Wednesday.

So look, rather than having to explain everything all over again, how about I just put the Substack post I wrote yesterday, detailing it all, on here for you to read.

Yes, I know it’s a cop out but if you will just have a glance at this then I think you will permit me this one extravagance. Seriously, it’s been that bad.

Anyway, without further ado, check this out…

From Substack: 27th June 2024

I was struggling for a title for this post. My initial thoughts were “Abscess Makes the Heart Grow Fonder” or perhaps “Come To the Boil” or even “Cyst-ematic!” At one stage I even contemplated “Simon and Carbuncle!” In the end I’ve gone for What’s New Pus-sy Cat? And that’s because I’m currently having a bit of an issue with pus.

I know, I know, gross isn’t it? But it’s a fact of life that from time to time most of us will need a bit of lancing at some point in our lives. And right now, I’ve had a go at it.

I have an abscess on my back the size of the Isle of Wight and it’s making me feel extremely poorly. That’s the reason why I failed to post on Monday and Wednesday; I was feeling just too damned ill.

Like all idiots I tried to lance the seething, glistening, pulsating thing myself and did manage to get some gunk out of it. My beautiful better half also attempted in a less aggressive fashion and got some more out of it using a combination of tea tree oil and hot water. But with every attempt we just seemed to make the thing angrier and angrier and now it’s reached the stage where it resembles a 1:1 scale model of Ayres Rock and I had to seek urgent medical attention.

I didn’t know that our local surgery had an Advanced Practice Nurse but I made an appointment to see her on Monday morning. She was very good and I could see the pity in her eyes as she tended to this poor, old, pus-filled man who had crept into her consulting room like a grotesque and hellish vision of corruption and diseased flesh. I was hoping that perhaps she might have a crack at lancing it herself but no, it had gone way beyond that; the situation called for medication. Strong, powerful medication. Arse-kicking medication.

So I’m now on Flux… floxi… flummox…

…antibiotics.

And they’re having a positive effect already after only 48 hours. I’m much more comfortable to the point where I feel well enough to write and catch up with my Substack and other things. Mind you, I don’t want to get one stuck in my throat; they’re like trying to swallow rugby balls.

I’ve no idea how this thing first came to be either. It just appeared one day and has grown like a well-manured marrow ever since. At first I thought that it might be a bad insect bite as I am terribly prone to having mozzies and horseflies sink their filthy little teeth into me every Summer. But that’s another story. And how does one get an abscess in the first place? I do not know.

Anyway, I’m on the mend now and hopefully can get back to some sort of normality.

Oh! I’ve just thought of another title – Sir Lanced-a-lot! Which, in hindsight, might have been better.

(sigh…)

So there you go. It’s all been rather unpleasant here at Blessham Hall this week, be assured of that. The good news is that the abscess has reduced greatly in size to where it’s more molehill than mountain and I’ve not had any adverse reactions to the medication.

Phew!

I’ll be back with a proper blog post next week.

Thank you for your patience.

In the meantime you can read and subscribe (for free) to my Substack HERE

Tunnel Vision

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I’ve done it again, haven’t I? I’ve gone an absolute eon since the last blog post, which, if I remember correctly, was all to do with alpacas and cuteness. Nearly a month ago! I suppose I could throw myself on your mercy and say I’ve got no excuses and that I’m a horrible toad of a person who doesn’t deserve to have his blog read and that you should cross the road to avoid me; but actually, I do have an excuse.

I’ve been suffering from tunnel vision.

Not the actual physical condition where one’s eyesight is badly impaired by glaucoma, which sounds absolutely awful and my heart goes out to anyone with it; but more the metaphorical condition where one is totally focused on just one thing that everything else fades into the background.

Why do I keep saying “one?” It’s not like I’m royalty or anything.

Anyway, that’s the state of play and I have definitely been so focussed on one particular thing that it would seem that I have lost sight of all my other outlets. I refer, of course, to Substack.

Now I will be completely honest right from the off that I have become somewhat addicted to it. And I don’t see that as necessarily a bad thing, it’s just that it has been a huge distraction from all else.

I really do like Substack you see. I like the whole ethos of independent writers getting paid for their work as opposed to giving it away for free, which is sadly so often the case. I personally give away more books than I sell, although at this stage of the game I look upon that as a marketing strategy, but it doesn’t alter the fact that we all like to be paid for the effort we put in and that’s what Substack is all about. Well, not all, there is the obvious benefit of simply being recognised as an author, which is worth its weight in saffron (Google it).

So yes, I admit, that all my energy (what little I have) has been poured into Substack of late but you can’t say I didn’t warn you; there was a blog post about it. As it stands I’m up to three Substack posts a week. Which usually appear on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. So far at least. And the wonderful thing about it is that despite me not being paid a penny from it thus far I am being read quite widely. And to me that is a beautiful thing. Just to know that what I’ve taken the trouble to write is being seen by people who are taking the trouble to read. And that is what is so addictive about it.

Actually being read!

But, like all addicts, I do realise that I have a problem and that problem is the neglect of all the other irons I have in the literary fire.

However, there is good news as far as The Pheasants Revolt is concerned!!! I’ve finally finished re-working the blessed, wonderful, magnificent thing and I now consider it fully fit for purpose in the same way that Ah Boy! and Medicine Show are. It’s cleaned up, de-typoed and a much better read all round. Plus it has a sexy new back cover. So you see, I can break from Substack when I need to.

Also, I’ve begun work on Hot Eire in the same vein.

“Ah!” You may cry, “what about that new Archie and Aggie novel you promised us? Where’s that you lying little hound?”

Hold your horses a minute, it’s coming; for I have indeed found time to work on that as well.

And if you so desperately want a new novel from yours truly then you can begin reading one right away. For every Friday on Substack I publish a new chapter of a book I wrote in 2006, called ‘Take a Hike.’ That’s not the original title. The original title makes me shudder with embarrassment and it shall not be uttered here or anywhere else for that matter.

Being almost twenty years old does mean that its a bit raw and perhaps even a tad naïve in places but in it you can definitely hear the fledgling start to my career as an author as I try to find my voice. And actually, it is quite a compelling story as well.

It’s there for anyone to read for free!

And so can you.

Click Here to be transported to Chapter 1.

or…

Click Here to go to my Substack Home page.

I mean look, lets be honest, at least I haven’t been idle, have I? And the thing about being a writer in the 21st century is that you have to be flexible and fluid in your approach and be prepared to adapt to different outlets. That’s the absolute truth and it’s what I’ve been doing.

So to answer any burning questions you may have, here are the answers:

  • Yes, there will still be a new Archie and Aggie novel this year
  • Yes, I will do a damn sight better with the blog i.e. frequency
  • Yes, Hot Eire will be re-jigged/improved upon a.s.a.p
  • Yes, Substack will continue 3 days a week
  • Yes, I will give up all beers, wines and spirits

Just for fun, see if you can guess which one of those bullet points is false.

I do fondly and sincerely hope you will hop over to Substack and have a read of the output that’s on there so far. It’s all good clean laugh out loud fun apart from a rather sad and serious short story I wrote about a small dog, which is a bit of a tearjerker and a massive side-step from my usual scribblings.

If you’d care to subscribe to my Substack, you can still do so for free as it’s going to be some time before I start charging people (if ever) but you’ve got to start somewhere haven’t you? Also, please do leave a comment or a ‘Like’ as it’s the little things like that that keep us indies believing.

Have a gorgeous weekend everyone, enjoy the football, if that’s your thing, I hope the Sun shines wherever you are in the world and I will see you back here at Blessham Hall very, very soon.

I promise x