Mind out. Mind your back. Mind how you go. Mind over matter etc etc.

And so we come to the last in this little series of Self Preservation posts and I’ve rather enjoyed sharing my journey on the road to personal improvement with you. And the final, and perhaps most important stage of the journey for me is how to improve my mind.

Here’s the thing. I have a very profound fear of dementia based on very real facts that my poor brain has taken a proper pasting over the years. I have received more concussions via accidental blows to the head than I care to mention. There have been many such incidents during my time in manual labour and also one particularly bad one when I dived into a swimming pool on holiday when I was twenty years old, swam across the width like Johnny Weissmuller and then connected abruptly with the side of the pool with the top of my head. And yes, of course I was trying to prove my prowess to the ladies although having to be dragged unconscious out of the water by my friend didn’t exactly add to my appeal with the opposite sex.

On top of all this though, as a kind of warped little cherry on the cake as it were, I had encephalitis in 2003 which very nearly killed me and I’ve never been the same since. The last brain scan I had a few years ago revealed that there was something on the brain that didn’t look quite right but they couldn’t say exactly what. The last piece of advice they gave me was to live my life and if I ever had any problems with my head then to come straight back and tell them.

Hmmm!

So as you can see I am a bit of a walking time bomb. I may live to a ripe old age without losing the old marbles but there’s a distinct possibility that it could go the other way. And that frightens me gentle reader, it really does. Terrifies me. I recall visiting an elderly relative a few years ago in a nursing home and it was frankly awful. The odour of the place was as foetid as a navvy’s armpit and the food that was placed in front of these venerable ladies and gentlemen looked utterly revolting and about as palatable as a plate full of John Innes No.3 compost; but sadly those poor old souls were none the wiser.

I do feel that I’ve got genetics on my side a bit though. My mother is now in her 90’s and in rude health for her age. Yes, she’s getting very forgetful now but that’s a fairly recent development. Likewise my grandmother, 92 years old when she passed away, was as sharp as a tack right up until the end. Her secret? She kept her mind active. She read avidly. She watched interesting TV shows as opposed to soaps and trash. She took plenty of fresh air and beautiful scenery. She holidayed in Scotland where the terrain is pure mind candy. She did crosswords and puzzles in the newspaper and the dear old People’s Friend magazine. She kept the old grey matter as busy as she could.

And that, my friends, is what I intend to do also.

Obviously writing for a living will help massively but I want more than that. I want to exercise that big funny shaped muscle between the ears as much as possible. Quizzes, word games, joke writing, studying literature, learning new technical things and keeping up with the times, reading voraciously, engaging in meaningful conversation, appreciating the natural world; it’s all going to help.

Let’s face it. There’s no point in me using Dr Balls Bollock Balm or losing weight or having new glasses if I’m not going to get the most of them due to the gradual deterioration of my mind. And I do think it’s an area that a lot of us neglect. It’s too easy you see. We’re told what to do with our minds all the time. We’re conditioned to come home after a hard days work and slump on the couch to watch mind numbing shows like X Factor, The Masked Singer (God but I loathe Davina McCall), Big Brother, Love Island and a whole slew of trivial shash that does nothing to improve our minds or feed our imaginations.

Revolt, my friends, while you’ve still got a chance. Free your minds. Say NO to Simon Cowell and his ilk, don’t let the media dumb down your life so that they can fill their pockets. Put down that remote control and pick up that crossword book or novel instead. Trust me, by the time you’re in your eighties you’ll thank me.

So there you have it. I’m well on the road to making vast changes in my life, both physically and mentally and I would love it if you’d join me on the journey. As for me, I’m now off to read a few more chapters of the book I’m currently ploughing my way through and then I shall have a couple of hours bashing away at the old laptop on my own current work in progress.

Look after your minds folks. You only get the one.