One year ago today our nephew Gary was brutally murdered; stabbed to death by his girlfriend. I won’t mention her name; the courts have already dealt with her. No, it is Gary who is in the thoughts and prayers of all who knew that kind-hearted soul, not the psychotic woman who robbed him of his life. Today, Ange and I, and so many others, stand with Gary’s parents Jim and Sandra and his five brothers, to raise awareness of domestic violence against men, which is far more endemic than most people realise.

I’ve written the following piece for Gary and I hope you will take a few minutes to read it; it’s only 300 words long. All I ask is that you read it slowly, mindfully, prayerfully and contemplatively. And if you yourself are a victim of domestic violence it is my profound wish that it encourages you to talk to someone, anyone, about it.

We can’t bring Gary back but we can raise awareness so that other families won’t have to go through the same heart-wrenching grief that his family are still going through.

Thank you.

#voiceforgary

Silence

By Alan Stevenson

For Gary Morgan

Silence…

In this increasingly busy and maddening world so many of us crave it. We desire solitude and quiet spaces to think, to breathe and to feel more alive. We seek it out in wild places from seashore to forest to mountain top and when we find it we often find ourselves.

Silence…

Snowfall, blanketing the streets and countryside and even muffling the myriad sounds of nature. Instilling deep and warm feelings of nostalgia and fond memories within us and the promise of well-being.

Silence…

The feeling of eeriness that there’s no-one there but you and your thoughts and the un-nerving fragility of being on your own. Perhaps only temporary and fleeting, perhaps, something more lasting and almost tangible. A fear of the dark maybe.

Silence…

Loneliness, sadness, sorrow and grief. No strength in numbers. No-one to talk to, laugh or cry with; just you and those four walls. A prisoner in your own home. Alone.

Silence…

No-one to turn to, fearing for your own safety, your sanity, your life.

Silence…

You’re a man they say. You need to big it up. Grow a pair. Stand up for yourself. Big boys don’t cry. Real men don’t take crap. So what do you do? You keep schtum and you hope and pray that tomorrow things will change. Maybe tomorrow she won’t hurt me with her words. Maybe tomorrow she won’t hit me with whatever comes to hand. Maybe tomorrow my very life won’t be in danger of unwarranted physical abuse. Maybe, just maybe, she’ll change. If I just stay silent.

Silence…

Death, the grave, the great unknown beyond. Dear friends and loving family left to mourn. Lives destroyed by domestic violence. It shouldn’t happen to anyone. Ever!

Speak out or forever hold your silence…